Fuck Yeah Demigods
by SunCentenary
Summary: Pretty much a regular story about demigods. Y'know, wake up go to school save the world. That kind of stuff.
1. Chapter 1

Wesley Ruston opened his blue eyes to a dark hand poking him in the face. The pain was unbearable but Z rolled her big brown eyes and defended herself, "Don't be such a baby. It was only a light poke".

He didn't bother trying to poke her back, and it wasn't because he was a gentleman (because he wasn't) but more or less the fact although she was a girl she could easily hand his hubris to him on a platinum platter of whoop-ass. That and she was a good friend.

Wesley rubbed his cheek while Reus, who was sitting in front of them gave him a sympathetic look, his thick eyebrows scrunching together. He too was also the target of some of Z's 'light slaps', but he was prone to it more due to knowing Z ever since the third grade. And by also having a big mouth.

To Wesley's right he found he had fallen asleep on his dear friend Nick. Nick turned his eyes to Wesley, and adjusted his glasses. Nick looked like a huge nerd, kind of like a clone of Steve Urkel, but his eyes were as black as night and his eyelashes made girls everywhere cry in jealousy.

'Oh _now_ you're awake' Nick teased, but without malice. He just smiled and tried to go back to sleep. In the seat next to Reus, Marcie quipped 'Is Wesley nearly awake yet?'

Marceline was a sweet girl who always had her hair tied back in a ladylike bun and knew the best pair of clothes to wear. But she wasn't overly girly, just enough to keep her parents happy. That's what Marcie liked to do, make people happy, and she did it well.

Nick pushed the tinier boy's head off his shoulder, but pushed only lightly. Wesley's blue eyes looked around and spotted Roxanne walking down the bus isle, holding out her pale white hands. Happily he grabbed her hands and grinned as she pulled him to the front of the bus to where she sat.

"My pretty knight in shining armor' he gushed. Roxanne blushed and stuttered, 'It was nothing! You guys were being really loud and the bus driver got annoyed.'

In the driver's seat an old guy with John Lennon frames was shimmying his shoulders to the jazz music on his iPod. He doubted the driver could hear anything under his huge headphones.

Wesley made an odd freaky noise, like he could never even contemplate the thought of him and co. as being 'loud'. Obviously he had never listened to a recording of his voice. As he laid his head on the chair she began braiding his dark blond hair, in the same fishtail style her dark brown hair was. He flinched a tiny bit and tensed his shoulders, like he was about to be attacked.

"Sorry Wes, I for-" she was interrupted by Marceline, who looked to the front where the two sat and yelled (Well, as loud as Marceline could actually get, which wasn't much), "Do you know when we're getting to the airport?"

"Not long now" Heidi called from the seat near the back, to Marcie's right. Marcie smiled at Heidi and began talking to Reus about something. Heidi pulled her Goth hoodie down over her eyes and went back to sleep. Wesley did the same.

~X~

Wesley looked out the airplane's tiny window at the sun going down. He felt less stronger then he was before. Beside him Marceline was playing Angry Bird on her iPhone, letting him have time alone to think. Maybe it was the fact that he spent the last two nights awake packing bags and thinking of how to ignore his family. Either way he was feeling dead tired but the nap on the bus made him feel better.

He felt thin spidery fingers tapping him on the head. He knew who it was. Wesley rolled his eyes and turned to face Victor Wills. For some reason Victor's overcoat was over his head, making him look like a nun, which he was anything but. Next to him was Weasel, despite the name, a much nicer individual one would say. Truth is he just hid it better. Good boys are just bad ones who haven't been caught.

'Heard that Z was giving you trouble. You want to start somethin'?' Victor smirked. He was offering Wesley a tiny bottle in his thin pale hands. It was a small carton of green goo. Wesley was about to ask just where he got it from when he noticed Weasel adjust his glasses. Oh. They both were down for it. Usually they wouldn't even try anything on Z or their close friends, but she 'lost' their backpack (the one that contained all their dried fruit) which Wesley was kind of grateful for. He turned around and slumped in his seat ignoring the two dorks in the seat behind.

Wesley sighed, letting out an extremely tired groan. Marceline grinned at his lameness. The airplane exploded. Wait, what the fuck?


	2. Chapter 2

Sup? Author dude here. To anyone reading this, this is a project thought up by a thirteen year old dude with way too many wonderful nerdy friends, in case anyone was wondering why the hell there's like ten characters introduced in the first chapter. It was thought up one day out of boredom but everyone wanted to join in so I thought 'Why not?". Also the second chapter is short I know, but what do you expect? The things that come from my mind is intangible.

By the way my fantastic readers, care to tell me what you're favourite ship is throughout the story? Also write what you think should happen.

Another thing, like I mentioned in the first paragraph, this is a project thought up by a hyperactive teen. Maybe after ten chapters (if I get that far) I'll go through everything and polish it. For now I'm going to stick with that old fashioned rustic style. Christmas break is coming up in the Middle East so maybe I'll oil a few hinges and repair the wheels.


	3. Rainbow Language

"FUUUUUUUUCK!" Wesley cussed as he fell through the air. A hundred miles away a mother was covering her child's ears, the windows of a small shed were broken and a boy gasped at the seemingly omniscient swearing. As if done by the hand of a god to preserve the innocence of anything within a hundred mile radius Wesley fell into the ocean. It's amazing that he didn't die.

Nearby Heidi was taking off her heavy hoodie as it was weighing her down. Nick was doing a terrible doggy paddle. Marceline was crying and looked ugly as hell due to being terrified. Reus and Weasel were chilling on some driftwood that appeared the fuck out of nowhere. Victor had a foot in his face (courtesy of Reus) who was trying to get on to the driftwood.

"Bitch. Please" Weasel mewled. Roxanne was floating nearby doing a lovely starfish motion. Z was flailing around like one of those weird inflatables you see at used car shops. Marceline promptly wet her pants as Wesley hit the water. Weasel was thrown off the driftwood and landed on top of Nick, promptly drowning them both. Wesley promptly started crying along with Marcie. Heidi promptly screamed at how much the situation sucked.

"Trololol" Victor sang happily as he got on the driftwood. That damn troll.

Anyway the group spent the whole hour trying to swim to the nearby island. If you thought this was a fanfiction about Greek gods you were right but also wrong. By the time they finally washed up on the shore Wesley, Marceline and Roxanne passed out, Nick had got lost somewhere, Reus was curled up on the beach and Weasel and Victor were huffing and puffing. Only Z was strong enough to stand and just barely.

"The ocean… Flipping… SUCKS" Z moaned. A boy with black hair and grey eyes slapped her in the back of the head with the flat side of his sword. Z fell onto the sand with a loud thud.

"No it does not" he said coldly. Behind him a girl with long curly hair and hipster glasses rolled her eyes.

"Godammit Austin! We were supposed to be stealthy!" she groaned at him.

"Delilah, if they're monsters then it's best to attack first" he argued back. Reus curled out of his ball long enough to give Austin the middle finger.


	4. You're a wizard Harry!

After the extremely long commercial break we now bring you back to: Fuck Yeah Demigods!

Our daring heroes were captured by Delilah a curly haired hipster gal and Austin, an extremely hot douchebag. They are currently holding them captured at a camp and being taken to a large white house. Some are crying (Wesley, Marceline), some are pissed (Heidi, Z, Reus) and some are trying not feel as if this is their last day on Earth (Roxanne and Victor). The only one who we now can't officially tell how they're feeling is Weasel because he has a bag over his head due to the fact he bit both Austin and Delilah.

"It's going to be okay! Stop crying" Victor said to Wesley and Marcie, but it was no use. Wesley's a huge fricking wimp. Marceline was grown up enough though to stop crying to an unhappy frown and tired red eyes. Delilah looked sadly to the two watery faced kids, "It's okay... We're not going to hurt you."

To this Heidi muttered quietly a disbelieving cuss. Sadly Austin heard her and smacked her in the back of the head.

"Don't touch her you dickhead" Z growled. Austin's mouth went tight lipped as if he couldn't believe what she had just said to him. Before there was a huge fight between the two a hideous huge terrifying creature came out of the large terrifying house. Reus screamed in an extremely high-pitched voice. The ginormous thing put its hands over its ears.

"Chiron! Are you okay?" Austin asked, concern in his voice. Roxanne's eyes widened at the revelation that Austin might be a real boy after all. Roxanne and Z were the only ones smart enough to realise this was a centaur. The others were too busy wetting their pants. Chiron shook his head and forced a smile towards the new comers.

"I'm fine Austin. Who are these new students?" Chiron asked. Heidi's big brown eyes widened from behind her glasses.

"SCHOOL?!"

"We didn't get to talk much after this one bit me and Delilah" Austin growled, referring to Weasel the sack headed boy. Weasel promptly gave him the backwards v-sign. Since he couldn't see though it was directed towards a tree. That poor tree. What did she ever do to him?

Anyway.

Chiron invited them inside the house and had with them 'The Talk". Jesus man no not that talk. You're disgusting! They're all only around fourteen! Except for Nick, he's only like, eleven. Where is that little fucker anyway?

As if to answer our question a green energy blast smashed through a glass window of the room they were in. Through the smoke you could see a tiny nerdy finger adjusting his glasses. It was Steve Urkel I mean Nick.

"NICK!" Wesley cried joyously at his tiny friend. Wesley seriously needs to pull himself together. Chiron seemed apathetic as well as Austin, who only raised an eyebrow at the young wizard boy. Delilah was in fighting stance with a fluffy pillow as a shield/club. Reus felt his heart swell with joy. He had been waiting to say this one line his whole entire life!

"You're a wizard Harry!" screamed Victor. Reus felt like crying.


	5. Real Greek Flames

While Reus curled up in a ball of woe on the couch, and Victor laughed his head off, the other people in the room were waiting for more energy blasts. Once again Nick adjusted his glasses. Mightily Nick held up a tiny hand which was engulfed in a ferocious green flame.

"Hand over my friends or else" the young boy growled. Before Chiron could say something soothing Austin stood up and demanded, "Or else what?"

As soon as he ended that sentence a fire ball was launched at his direction. He would've been eradicated if it wasn't for Delilah and her quick reflexes. Chiron let out a bellowing yell.

"Enough!" his voice it seemed shook the whole house. Everyone was terrified. What was this monstrous thing? Nick looked at his scared friends and then back to the centaur. He had to be brave. For them.

"We only mean to help you" Chiron said, his voice still loud and strong but without a trace of malice. "This is Camp Half Blood, where we have kept demigods safe for millennium."

"Mostly safe for millennium" growled Delilah from the corner. She was trying to douse the green flames with no luck. Still Nick was clicking his fingers and mumbling something.

"Bullshit" growled Heidi.

"Yeah!" Z agreed, "If we're demigods how come nothing exciting ever happens to us?"

"We just fell out of a plane and was kidnapped by Horseman and two accomplices" came a muttered answer from under a sack.

"Shut up Weasel" Heidi said. Chiron held up his hands, but coughed on the smoke from the flaming pillow. Austin opened a water bottle that fell on the floor and waterbended them to suffocate and attack the flames. Instantly they disappeared. Every single one of the kids were quiet.

"Well then" Z said. It was obvious she was impressed. Marcie passed out on the couch.


End file.
